Expat Journal

Expat family

Yesterday was a special day: a friend decided to conclude her experience as a Taal coach (that is, a Dutch teacher).

Five years ago, along with another wonderful person, Caroline, Danielle became my Dutch teacher.

The lessons took place in the morning, during school hours, among the children's desks.

At first, I avoided participating: my English was limited, I was exhausted from the move, I wanted to stay in my bubble of isolation, and being naturally introverted, socializing was challenging.

But I had to learn Dutch: my daughter would have done so within a few months, and I couldn't fall behind. I walked into a room full of women and one man, all expats and mothers.

In front of us stood this duo of friends full of determination, eager to make us feel welcome, to pull us out of loneliness, to give us a space where we could feel active and ourselves, not just in relation to our family or social connections (the mom of..., the wife of...).

Their friendship, sense of humor, and hearty laughter turned us into a group of friends and, after 5 years, an extended family.

Each person's story, education, and cultural background mattered little.

The only thing that matter is taking care of each other.

We experienced all the challenges of moving abroad with or without children, pregnancies, menopause, the cold climate, being foreigners, and feeling a bit strange.

During the pandemic and forced isolation, we connected through various Zoom and Teams meetings, wished each other good night, had dance and cooking classes, and so on.

Distant yet always close. Not even the lockdown made us feel isolated.

Before moving, I wouldn't have thought of finding new friends: age, cultural misunderstandings, language. I am grateful to these women. And I am grateful to myself for giving myself permission to try and get involved despite everything.

If you are an expat too, my advice is to leave the door open, be ready to say yes – it will change your life.